Man listen

Man listen....

We don't have to accept your under developed emotionally ass, we don't want to help raise you nshit. (it's not that we can't, shit is just draining). Women catch hell for picking the wrong guys, staying too long, leaving too early, being too strong, being too emotional, being too independent, or being too needy...at the SAME DAMN TIME. Meanwhile, men out here getting passes and being offered forgiveness for cheating and all of the mental anguish they cause by being overgrown boys  who confuse vulnerability with weakness. But oh yea...women are THE problem. 

You are not Jay-Z, you are not a billionaire, I did not clap for him and I will not clap for you. Who gets accolades for behaving as any responsible adult should?! 😒🙄

A letter to my love

December 31, 2012

My love,
I started this year nothing like I'm ending it. I am so thankful that God saw fit to allow our paths to cross. I've dealt with every type of obstacle imaginable this year and in the end came out stronger, more patient, more passionate, and happier than I ever could have been. With you, I feel like I conquer the world. To speak to my mind, body and spirit. You compliment me oh so well, and keep me balanced.   I'll continue to try to be patient in anticipation of what our futures hold and I'm certain- that this time next year we will no longer be separated by miles and I can kiss the love of my live on New Year's Day.  Love you more than I'll ever be able to express.

Fireworks

September 20, 2012

Still trying to figure out how- TRUTH or DARE turned into this!  The passion was undeniable. Magical almost. Forget a spark-we had fireworks.  I admit, my heart was guarded. Sex is sex, but my heart.....that's another issue.  Our first time.....you made love to me.  I pushed all of my emotions to the side and kept saying "it's too soon".  When I said "I want you to be all mine", I thought "he's just running game!"  And then- as if on cue, your true character shined through. It confirmed that you were genuine and I had nothing to fear. In disbelief, I reluctantly allowed my mind to catch up with my heart. Thankful for how amazing you were and praying that I could be the women that you need. In love with you!!!

Independence Day

Never thought I'd meet someone that would sweep me off my feet. Someone who makes my heart flutter & throw all rational thoughts out of the window. I have allowed myself to become totally engulfed in love. It's amazing how God makes things crystal clear when it's time. No questions need to be asked because He'll show you everything! I'm elated to have already been given opportunities to see his true character. No doubt- he's so genuine, caring,& charismatic. My 4th of July....Independence Day, a day of new beginnings. New beginnings to believe that your heart knows exactly what you want....it just takes your mind a minute to catch up. I'm not afraid anymore! "I think I'm in love.......again"....have I found my prototype!?

The pants....

Always spoke about it but never fully understood it. In order to get what I want in a relationship- I have to be what I want. Understanding, compromising, confident not cocky, & 1 of the most hardest things to do for THIS woman- be submissive.  By definition being submissive is:  "inclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others or showing such inclination.". This word is notorious for  causing fear, rebellion, & anger in women. We can't confuse submission & controlling.  Allowing a man to be a man is more than the amount of money you make. That part I've never had a problem with. Now, allowing him to make the decisions, express his opinion of what WE should or should not do, be responsible for me (& I not worry) - I've struggled with them all. I've been strong & independent forever. Not because of preference but out of necessity. I know the man is suppose to wear "the pants" but when you've grown accustomed to doing it all & having EVERYONE consistently depend on you to get it done- you take off the skirt & pumps & throw on "the pants" because there's work to be done!  But how can you need a man if you are the man?~hmmm....I get it...NOW!  You have to allow him to be the gentleman you expect him to me. If he says he got it, let him have it. Talk only half as much as you listen (I'm working on that ;-) ) Be considerate, although he may make you feel that it's all about you- you have to stay grounded & make him feel like its all about him. Build him up, be honest but not critical. Inspire & be willing to communicate- clearly.  You can't learn something new if no one is willing to teach you. I must remind all women & men- it's a process. He or she may not be all that you WANT, but look again- they may be exactly what you NEED. 

Either or!

We want it all & we want it now! Gotta have patience! Yes, patience! My "perfect" guy: I want someone smart-a college grad, yet street smart. Fashionable, pants fitted but not too-tight. Treat me like a queen but not allow me to have my way ALL of the time. I wanna feel secure but not smothered. Cool with trying new things, but not over the top with it. Like classical music, but can jam with me to "No hands"- lol. Works hard, knows that i got it but offers anyways. Pays attention to my body language & knows when i need a hug or laugh. Someone who can appreciate my natural beauty in addition to my curves. He needs to be young enough to keep up with me yet mature enough to handle me; not either or.
Once you remove the gay guys, married guys, and guys who play games out of the picture what are you left with?! Exactly, mr.nice guy.....unfortunately most women (self-included) have no idea how to handle or even begin to relate to the token nice guy! *sigh We always want it all, but do I have to settle for either....or? Am I being selfish/greedy for wanting it all....NOW!? we've all met guys we liked & said "he's cool,but...." is it self-sabotage or our own insecurities that forces us to focus on the 1 thing we dislike instead of the 20 things we love? Let me get it together, let go & let flow & stop looking for either or.(taking my own advice)

Mr. Right Now

Don't confuse compromising with settling.  There IS a HUGE difference and we must be able to identify them. We all want our "Mr. Right" but did any of us ever stop to think that "Mr. Right Now" maybe all that we can currently handle or are prepared for.  Mr. Right Now could be all that we ever imagined our "Mr. Right" would be, except he has that 1 thing that we won't compromise on.  We want that perfect guy, but are we the perfect lady?  Being honest with yourself is often the most difficult thing to do. It is alright to be alone, some of us need this to find out who we really are and what we really want.  Mr. Right Now does not have to be a bad thing.  He can teach you things about yourself and keep you entertained while you're still looking for Mr. Right.  The problem presents itself when we attempt to change Mr. Right Now into Mr. Right.  Everyone that comes in and out of our lives serves a purpose, whether we choose to believe this or not.  You can choose to ignore that purpose or embrace it. Embrace the lessons, and reasons that person has been placed into your life and let go when you are suppose to.  Someone who is perfect for you now, may not be perfect forever!  

My twitter homie @Chyuuch said it best when he said: "We ain't gotta be 2gether 4ever-but let's just fully enjoy the time we have w/o wasting a second holding back.